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less charming and more strange than your average blog

November 04, 2003

Eric: The Lost Documents, part IX 

Grade: 7
Subject: Drama
Description: Monologue to be performed by a sock puppet named "Anthug." The sock puppet was actually part of the assignment, then we had to write and perform a monologue as the character. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure I never go to perform this one in front of the class, because it's not even finished, and there's a big red X and the word "NO!" written on the paper by the teacher.

"My name is Anthug. My parents dropped me when I was a baby and I was permanently damaged. So they threw me over the edge of a bridge. I was soon found by a bunch of sewer rats and they ate off some of my hair, kiling the hair follicles in certain places. ["I remember putting that in to justify the crappy job I did attaching Anthug's yarn hair." -- Eric 2003] They kept me for a while, nibbling on various parts of me until I became hideously deformed. When I was 5, I crawled away and started a band."
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